guestblogfrizday – take a stroll down fast food memory lane

3 Sep

from the bro-in-law (kteb’s bro-in-law)

After looking down my nose at KTEB’s blog about her favorite chicken hut waffle fries,  it occurred to me that she thinks that these ridiculous things are so good because she’s in her mid-20’s.  A culinary baby.  I fully expect her to have a totally different view in a few years. Ever have steak-frites at a French bistro?   No matter.  Fast food still has its place.   As I have a few years on KTEB (OK, quite a few) I have gone through many stages of fast food dining.  And I must admit that despite more experience, a drive-through meal still has its place.  Here’s a review of fast food through my years.

Childhood – Oh my!  The salt. The grease.  That special sauce!  A trip to the drive-through at BK, or McD’s was a serious treat.  And no matter how many times my parents would try to convince me that the burgers we could grill in the backyard were better, I was not going to bite, no pun intended.

College – If I had any money in pocket I would absolutely be thrilled to sink my teeth into a quarter pounder with cheese AND that stupid monopoly game had me hooked too.  I must have dropped the equivalent of three or four text books trying in vain to get that F’ing Boardwalk game piece.  I was this close to $1M!!!!   Really!   (I know, me and 400, 000 other idiots).

One time on a road trip to Philly during my senior year, a buddy was eating a late night McDonald’s cheeseburger and had taken his fries and added them like a condiment.  I looked on, befuddled.  He simply looked up and said “it’s good” and shrugged his shoulders.  So I tried it and well, he was right.  See, Mom, I did learn something in college.  Anyway, if you think about it, fast food and college kind of go hand in hand.  Cheap, easily obtained and enough grease to satisfy a hangover.

20-Something’s – Yeah, I could still eat the crap, but I was starting to realize that my parents were right.  I could make a WAY better burger myself.  Couple that with this little story from the west coast.  At the ripe old age of 23 or so, my friend and I decided we had had enough of New England winters and headed to San Diego.  It’s not sunny and 72 there everyday but darn close to it!  Anyway, they have a completely different and expanded world of fast food options:  El Pollo Loco, Carl’s Jr, Roberto’s and Rubio’s (real fast food Mexican, not that taco Bell garbage) and the biggest one out there…….Jack in the Box.  Well, one day it turned out that several people were getting seriously ill eating at Jack in the Box and it was traced back to the burgers.  Seems that there were unacceptable levels of dung found in the meat. Wait! Doesn’t that mean that there are acceptable levels of dung?  Seriously!  Big time wake up call.  Despite covering all food groups with a Big Mac (all beef patties, cheese, tomatoes, bun etc…) I began to realize that this is simply junk food.  Nothing better, nothing worse.  Just junk.  Of course, in your 20’s, there is still a lot of drunken revelry going on, so as the years rolled on my fast food dining became more of a late night thing.  By my late 20’s BK Broilers gave way to stacks of pancakes and sausage at Bickfords, but pancake houses are an entirely different blog.

30’s – How can anyone eat this sh_t?  I think I actually got dizzy once while barreling down 95 south after trying to satisfy road hunger with a drive though.  If the food didn’t kill me by attacking my arteries, it would get me to drive off the road!  One time (with my then girlfriend and now wife) I stopped at the golden arches for some sustenance before a road trip we were about to embark on.  The McGriddles deluxe had just been launched and I figured it worth a shot.  After three bites I was in a quandary.  These might have been the greatest three breakfast bites in my life.  Sweet, salty, savory, cheesy……EVERYTHING!  But then I thought for a moment.  Syrup infused pancakes surrounding eggs, cheese and sausage.  If I finished the thing I should make sure that I do so in the hospital parking lot because I’m pretty sure cardiac arrest was imminent.  I was done.  I just couldn’t eat this junk anymore………or so I thought.

Beyond 30’s (I’m still dealing with my age.  Give me a break) – It had literally been years since I ate fast food and you know what?  I was better for it.  But then one night after getting out of work late, I was heading home and starving. My cute little New England town didn’t have too many offerings for quick and easy at the late hour so there I was, driving though McDonalds.  I have to say that the aroma wafting out of the drive through window was intoxicating- mmmmm.   I could already taste those salty fries.   A few minutes later, I was on my couch with a game on the TV and a cheeseburger in hand.  I downed that meal like I hadn’t eaten in days and I wasn’t dizzy!  A bit queasy maybe but I was fine.

I guess fast food can still have its place.  Just sparingly. So there it is.  Half a life of fast food.  I wonder what the second half will bring?  It might be cool to sit on porch at the old age home with a greasy bag of fries and a cheeseburger in hand…..with fries on it, or course.

(videos and links added by kteb, for fun 🙂 ).

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One Response to “guestblogfrizday – take a stroll down fast food memory lane”

  1. The wife September 5, 2010 at 10:12 am #

    I still contend that whatever age you are, Chicfila is ok to eat. The chickens are free range. However, I did just hear that they may add MSG. Yikes!

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